Conversations. Connection. Community.
Today I had an opportunity to speak with two women that I know, and also, don’t know all that well. Both conversations served as healing salves to my soul. We were able to go deeper in relationship and share intimate details of our lives. It turns out that our lived experiences mirrored one another. Yet, we would not have known this had we not decided to get vulnerable and share authentically.
As someone who has been harmed professionally and personally most often by white women, I understand the reluctance someone may have to be in relationship with someone for whom you’ve had challenges with in the past. One of the women I spoke with earlier today identifies as an Asian/Asian American Pacific Islander (AAPI) woman and the other one identifies as a white woman. It’s important to be honest if we want to navigate these difficult and hard topics.
I loved that I had an opportunity to speak candidly with both about a range of topics while also sharing our humanity as well. We have some shared social identities and we don’t share all of them which is wonderful. Similarities and differences are beautiful, acknowledging both is key.
It is definitely more difficult to cultivate empathy, compassion, and understanding when we are unwilling to have conversations with people, especially if they are not in agreement with us. Now, I want to be crystal clear. I would not be entertaining conversation with people who actively harm me or the ones I love. That said, I’m more open to engage in conversation when people are willing to meet me part of the way, especially if they enjoy more privileges than I do. I enjoy ample privileges and also experience oppression. It is important for me to note those facts as well.
The two women pictured with me in this photo are some of my favorite people - Taylor Trenchard and Carisa Montgomery. We live life alongside one another and celebrate the highs as well as navigate the lows. We live in three different cities and this photo was taken while we were at a leadership conference in Dallas, TX in January 2020, two and a half months before our lives changed due to a global pandemic that was and continues to ravage many corners of the world. We did not know what was coming around the corner.
Our sisterhood has only grown since the time that we have not been able to connect in person and that’s because we text daily, hop on FaceTime or Zoom, and genuinely are concerned when a problem arises and do our best to be co-conspirators and co-liberators as we walk our personal and collective roads of activating racial and social justice in our sphere of influence. It is a joy to be in relationship with these two women. And it was a joy to share conversations, connection, and community with the women that I was in Zoom rooms with earlier today.
At Revolutionary Love, we want to inspire conversations that will make way for connection, and connection that will lead to community. We hope you join one of our Conversation Circles soon.
